Twiddling thumbs just a little longer!

No Aunt Flo yet. I know, I know! I am not a patient person either!

I think my body is confused about what it's supposed to do. I mean, if you think about it, the only reason it's been really steady and on time with my cycles the past few month's is because of the uterine thinning lining medication. Typically I have very sporadic "moon cycles" and they usually last two weeks. So, I'll have two weeks on and then two weeks off... It's a nightmare!

Since taking this new medication, though, my cycle has been very heavy but "normal" in length and time of the month. The last moon cycle was only 7 days -- just like everyone else is supposed to be!

Now that we are all done with our testing they have taken me off the medication and my body is just saying, "What do you want me to do here? I don't understand!" I knew this was going to happen. My gut just knew...

I did call the fertility clinic in order to get a refill on my thyroid medication as I've run out so I did ask my favorite receptionist what I should do. She suggested I wait until the end of the weekend to see if I start my cycle and if not, to call again on Monday. Hence the twiddling of my thumbs!

No, I am not pregnant. I mean...we have had...y'know....fun in the bedroom cue the Barry White music here but I have taken three  home pregnancy tests to be sure and no...nothing....

I have a feeling they'll have me take a blood test to confirm I'm not pregnant and then place me on birth control to sort of jump start my cycle when they take the birth control away again. I am SO frustrated at that prospect for a few reasons.

a) My body has never reacted well to oral birth control. I bleed like a stuck pig and clot like nobodies business. (yes I'm being graphic. If you can't hack it, I apologize! I'm honest and blunt, at least!) Birth control is supposed to prevent you from bleeding for three weeks and then once its removed for that one week period you are to have your monthly cycle. My body doesn't react that way. I bleed almost immediately when birth control is introduced to my body. It's actually a little frightening just how much I bleed.

b) If we try this method this means we'll be waiting longer to start our Stim Cycle days (days when I take the stimulation drugs Gonal-F and Cetrotide). Again, I reiterate we cannot afford to wait any longer and what I mean by "afford" is not monetarily. Time is running out because of the IVF law changing.

c) There are major changes going on at work right now....Things I will not get into here but having IVF/ICSI delayed is really poor timing in regards to these company changes. It's stressing me out.... I'm panicking a little inside as I don't handle change well....

So, here I sit and wait and keep checking every time I pee to see if I'm spotting. Nope, I have not spotted the "eagle" as we are calling it in code during office hours.

On other note, our fellow co-worker mentioned an article she read about the new IVF law change to take place here in Ontario. sigh I'm so stressed out and this article about the law changing "any day now" is not helping to relieve my anxieties!

http://www.thestar.com/news/queenspark/2015/09/30/ontario-delay-of-ivf-treatment-plan-leaves-aspiring-parents-waiting.html

What they don't say in the article is how this affects current IVF patients who are already eligible for three tries at IVF under OHIP. I'm so worried there will not be a grandfather clause for Chris and I to still be eligible for our three tries. We may only get one shot at this... and that can very likely fail. We know the odds, we are hyper aware this is all just one moment away from not being available to us.

God, though, is here with us. He is aware of what is going on and He has every under control.... I keep telling myself that over and over again... 

I hope this weekend will be stress free as Chris and I have the weekend off from work. We will be staying at a friend's house (We call it the "The Hotel".) They're such people to allow us both a chance to get away from this little world of ours and relax in good company.

I can't wait to kick their butt at Pictionary and Joker Rummy! Bring it on! grins